The Socially Abrasive

The Blog of the One and Only, Latch Beam

Archive for May, 2010

Ginger McGuire

Posted by latchbeam on May 28, 2010

Hey, Ginger McGuire, the lady that fell asleep on the United Airlines airplane for hours… are you F-ing kidding me? You are trying to sue the airline because you were too lazy and/or stupid to wake up and get off of the plane?!? I just heard you on an interview and I think you may have left your personality and common sense (if you ever had any) on that plane as well.

This is basically what you said in your interview:
“Hi, my name is Ginger McGuire, and I’m suing because I am too stupid to know when to get off of the plane after it lands… the airline should be responsible, because I cannot take responsibility for myself.”

Your family and friends should be embarassed that they even know you…

Ginger McGuire Sleeping

This is how I sleep... look at me sleeping, I'm in idiot!

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Posted by latchbeam on May 27, 2010

I hate beets… I find it hard to believe that anyone likes them. Its not cool to eat beets. They are bloody red, smell like rotting garbage and taste like feet. To top it off, they are messy as F and difficult to clean up.

Just watch someone eat a large piece of cooked beet…watch the bloody juice stain their teeth… and then maybe bleed down their chin a little bit. Its F-ing disguisting…

For the beet lover out there, I challenge you to eat beets at least once every day for a week… and I’m not talking about one lame beat on a salad… I’m talking about one large serving of cooked beets. Do it! Do it and I GUARANTEE that you will puke.

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Lima Time

Posted by latchbeam on May 24, 2010

Unfortunately, Jose Lima (Pitcher) passed away yesterday… RIP Jose! He will always be one of my favorite baseball players ever… It get any better when he would say “Its Lima time!” or “Its Lima time… you better believe it!” That dude loved baseball and loved his fans!

Some of these Dbag baseball players could have learned a lot from Lima. He will be missed!

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Lebron James

Posted by latchbeam on May 18, 2010

He’s not fucking going anywhere… He’s staying in Cleveland. Stop it already!!!

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Adrian Wojnarowski

Posted by latchbeam on May 13, 2010

Adrian Wojnarowski, you are a fucking idiot for writing this article. You suck at life!!

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Zombie Satelite!

Posted by latchbeam on May 11, 2010

Galaxy 15 Satelite = Zombie Satelite… Watch out for zombies!!!


‘Zombiesat’ Satellite Galaxy 15 Could Cause Havoc

Updated: Monday, 10 May 2010, 2:07 PM EDT
Published : Monday, 10 May 2010, 1:41 PM EDT

(CANVAS STAFF REPORTS) – Forget the brainless creatures of the night. A provider of fixed satellite services has a high-tech zombie problem on its hands. and other media reported that an Intelsat satellite is not communicating with ground control and remains out of control. Industry officials stated that it is moving eastward and may cause havoc with other satellites in its path.

The Galaxy 15 communications satellite has remained on and its telecommunications payload is still functioning, but it has left its assigned orbital slot of 133 degrees west longitude.

Galaxy manufacturer Orbital Sciences Corp. of Virginia is pointing blame to an early April solar storm. The satellite stopped responding to ground controllers on April 5.

Aol News reported on Thursday that Intelsat officials studied different tests that they may be able to perform on the satellite to turn it off. They tried but failed “pulsing” it with signals to try to shut it off.

According to , Galaxy 15 is continuing on an orbital path occupied by C-band satellite AMC-11 operated by SES World Skies. Its still-operational payload could cause interference with the SES satellite for two weeks starting around May 23, according to estimates. stated that company officials tracking the “zombiesat,” a satellite term for a failed satellite in orbit, are now studying whether they can try to shut it down after it passes the AMC-11 and enters a stretch of territory unoccupied by other C-band spacecraft.

Yahoo! News reported that a vice president for satellite operations and engineering said Intelsat has sent between 150,000 and 200,000 commands to the satellite in nearly four weeks since it stopped responding.

Inselsat switched Galaxy 15 customers to Galaxy 12, another satellite that was moved from another orbital location.

GPS World said the satellite broadcasts GPS corrections for aviation and ground users in North America.

Intelsat will host a conference call on Wednesday morning to discuss latest on the satellite, according to a report on RapidTVNews .

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Jimmy Patsos Rumored to be Hired as Maryland Assistant Basketball Coach

Posted by latchbeam on May 10, 2010

Wow, rumor has it that Maryland is going to hire basketball “genius” Jimmy Patsos, Head Coach of Loyola College as an assistant coach (again)… the only coach that I know that considers an individual accomplishment (holding Stephen Curry scoreless) to be a team victory despite losing by 30 points!! That’s right they lost by 30 points!!!!

“Anybody else ever hold him scoreless?” Patsos said. “I’m a history major. They’re going to remember that we held him scoreless or we lost by 30?” (Here is the previous blog/article from Decemeber 2008

Hey Jimmy, the History major… I remember your selfish, bone-headed move! I remember that you lost by 30 F-ing points! Jimmy Patsos, you are still the worst coach in the history of basketball! I’m sure you are just trying to use your connections at Maryland to leverage a better salary at Loyola.

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China Hacks Into United States Trading Systems, Causing Market Crash

Posted by latchbeam on May 7, 2010

May 6th, 2010- China Hacks Into United States Trading Systems, Causing Market Crash

I Knew It Was You China, I Knew It All Along…

The Chinese government manipulated our trading system and caused the temporary 1,000 point drop… this is a CLASSIC conspiracy theory… so classic, its true. China, you did it… we all know it.

Why? Because China cheats… they cheat at everything. They break any law that they want, they don’t follow pantent rules, they take short cuts that kill consumers worldwide, and they constantly censor and abuse their own, especially their dissenting citizens.

PS- China cheated at the Olympics too (and still lost)!

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The Hole in the Ozone Layer

Posted by latchbeam on May 7, 2010

What a crock of shit that turned out to be!? I trust British scientitsts about as much as I trust the Chinese government.

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Lawrence Taylor and Ben Roethlisberger

Posted by latchbeam on May 7, 2010

Lawrence Taylor, Ben Roethlisberger and the Easter Bunny were walking down the street… Ben turns toward Lawrence and said, “Hey how old is she?”
Lawrence said, “Who fucking cares, Ben…?”

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